Inside Bert's Best Bro

Wedding

2007-01-07T19:41:00.000-05:00

Heres a picture

Jesus

2006-06-21T16:29:00.000-04:00

Jesus Christ is one of the most influential men in history. But why does he get his own religion? There's no Einsteinism? There's no Ernieism??? Godammit I'm starting my own religion. I think I will call it "Sexy Haters of Influences from Them" or just "SHIT." Just wait... there will be followers....

Sorry Folks

2006-05-15T17:43:00.000-04:00

Looks like I haven't updated in a loooooooong time. The reason being is that so much has been happening. What with divorce, moving, Myspace, where would I have found the time. Soon I will update more. Pretty much my dad lost his job, my mom lost her mind, I lost Asheville, and this blog had lost me. More later... Ernie.

PSYCHEDELIC

2006-02-16T16:41:00.000-05:00

PSYCHEDELIC

Bukowski

2005-12-16T22:49:00.000-05:00

Charles Bukowski is an amazing poet although a little depressed. This is a poem of his.

SHE SAID
from: War All the Time
what are you doing with all those papernapkins in your car?we dont have napkins likethat

how come your car radio isalways turned to some rock and roll station?do you drive around withsome young thing?

you're dripping tangerinejuice on the floor.whenever you go intothe kitchenthis towel getswet and dirty,why is that?

when you let my bathwater run you never clean the tub first.
why don't youput your toothbrushbackin the rack?
you should always dry your razor
sometimes I think you hatemy cat.
Martha says you weredownstairs sitting with her and you had your pants off.
you shouldn't wear those $100 shoes in the garden and you don't keep track of what you plant out there
that's dumb
you must always set the cat's bowl backinthe same place.
don't bake fishin a frying pan...
I never sawanybodyharder on the brakes of their car than you.
let's go to a movie.
listen what's wrong with you?
you act depressed.

Runescape, a Beautiful Thing

2005-12-15T20:01:00.000-05:00

Look closely. If you can't read it click the image.

School's Out Ho Hum

2005-12-15T06:43:00.000-05:00

Great, just great. Ice day or snow day or something but school is not in session today. I would be really happy but our Spring Break dies away with every snow day. I would rather sleep in till 12 on Spring Break than wake up at 6 in the morn' to find school canceled. So I'm sad.

R.I.P. Sarah F. Cook

2005-12-14T19:35:00.000-05:00

I regret to inform everyone that two days ago on 12/12/05 my Grandmother passed away. It was a peaceful and painless death in bed so I'm not too bummed but I thought I'd like to give her a tribute. Thanks...

Coke Wars Episode III-Revenge of the Bears

2005-12-13T22:11:00.000-05:00

This episode of Coke Wars is not about the flavors at all, but about the mascot on the can. For many many years now, Santa Claus and all his jolly goodness have occupied the space on the side of the Coke can for all to see. In addition to this, there were polar bears on the commercial on TV. But alas, no Santa this year? Personally, I didn't see any polar bear commercials last year. The polar bears have come back for revenge.
(Pictures soon)

P.S. On typing out this episode, I misspelled Santa occasionally. What creeped me out was Santa rearranged spells Satan. Coincidence?

SUBSCRIBE!!!

2005-12-12T19:02:00.000-05:00

DO YOU LOVE MY BLOG? DO YOU FEEL LEFT OUT WHEN I FORGET TO TELL YOU IT'S UPDATED? Well... NOW YOU CAN SUBSCRIBE!!! JUST E-MAIL ME AT punkiekid2003@gmail.com IN THE FOLLOWING FORM!!!

Title:SUBSCRIBE
Message:Something of relevance to subcription to my blog.
Signed:The email address you want it sent to.

Anytime you want to email me as a friend (without business) send it to punkiekid2003@yahoo.com not gmail.

The easiest way however, but I won't see it as quickly and thats why I prefer the above, is to just click the comments button below and comment with your email for the updates. Either way is fine.

The Best Picture EVER

2005-12-11T20:29:00.000-05:00

My (sadly) ex-girlfriend has a beautiful hind quarters of which she has given me permission to post to all of you onlookers who could and should dedicate a whole night to staring at it. (No offense Kyle.)

J-O-O to the Bizzle

2005-12-09T21:05:00.000-05:00

Religion is such a stupid thing. I mean it's alright to think of what happens to us after we die and all but the labeling thing is so stupid. Everybody tells everybody they either believe in God or they don't. To Christians, if you don't believe in God, it's like fuck you your going to hell. If a Catholic asks someone about their religion, it shouldn't be, do you believe in God? It should be, are you a Catholic? Because everybody except atheists believe in a God, it may be a different one than the certain one. So Christians, I'm cool with Christianity, just don't get so down on the atheists, because according to the Bible, the Jews are just as bad. And the Pagans. And the Buddhists. And the Muslims. And the Flying Spaghetti Monstrists. And to the Satanists, fuck yeah.

My pet

2005-11-28T16:35:00.000-05:00

I went to this cool website and adopted a pet dude. He is at the bottom of the page if you wanna see him. If you want your own pet go here.
http://bunnyherolabs.com/

Been a while...

2005-10-06T21:47:00.000-04:00

Wow two months has gone by so fast, I skipped seventh grade, got my band in a local newpaper, fought off weirdo Christian bastards at school, my life is odd. But this post has more meaning than an 8th grader's life. This post is all about the stupidity of our favorite president ever, Curious George Dubya Bushwacker.
Now la la la you may think I'm just joking around because of his hysterical name, but Yahoo has informed me with a long message of proof this guy is wacko. Bushwacker has informed America that God sent him to Iraq, Afghanistan Etc. "God would tell me 'George, go and end the tyranny in Iraq...' and I did," says our lonestar leader. I always thought the words "Separation of Church and State" had something to do with democracy. Apparently not.

Helping Cows Everywhere

2005-08-03T21:08:00.000-04:00

Recently I became a vegan. A lot of people have no idea what that is so I will explain it for you. Vegans eat no animal products whatsoever, for the sake of the animals and the vegan's own health. Veganism is much healthier than omnivorism(eating everything). Think of it as vegetarian but without dairy or eggs. It is one of the best things I have done for myself in a while and I highly suggest it. So do animals.

Coke Wars Delay.

2005-07-21T04:41:00.000-04:00

Sorry about the delay on coke wars. I'm just really lazy and coke wars is really hard to do. I will prolly make a new episode next week sometime. Until then. Sodomize your vast imagination with pornography you sick perverts. (Just Kidding)

Monawarda

2005-07-18T01:50:00.000-04:00

I have a program on my computer that you can mess with pictures. There are many Features like smear, blend, grow:etc.etc. My 10 year old brother was messing with the Mona Lisa and managed to make it look like Squidward and Mona Lisa had unprotected sex. I swear if he isn't a hobo he will be a professional artist. He is actually pretty good. Even with Kai's Power Goo.(That Program) Check it out. Also check out his blog. http://sandwichblader.blogspot.com/

YOUR FORTUNE!!!

2005-07-15T03:33:00.000-04:00

Recently I ate at a chinese restaurant. It was a great meal for a reasonable price and it came with the traditional fortune cookie. Now, normally I appreciate my fortune cookie's message and take it into my heart, but this time I got ripped off. Fortune cookies tell you your fortune. This one gave me a shitty message that anyone would know about me. "You have friends of many standards." Wtf? I have friends from music, skating, and even that hobo on Main Street. Just because I'm a dumbass, I am gonna make some of my own fortune cookie messages.

Okay, that middle one was from rocko's modern life. The others were mine.

Attention!!!

2005-07-10T22:06:00.000-04:00

Due to lack of time, I will be going down to about one article a week starting from this article. Thank you for visiting my blog though:).

Coke Wars Episode 2, Attack of the Flavors

2005-07-08T20:53:00.000-04:00

So far we have covered Original, Diet, and Caffeine-free. Let's see what flavors we will come across today....

WTF? Caffeine-free and diet? Honestly, how many insomniacs are fat? At least theres no b/s like Classic.

Cherry Coke. Why? Here's the story. A main man in the coke industry walked into a rundown soda fountain back in the 70's. The waitress was a drunk and took his order. He ordered a large coke. She went back in the soda room and started fixing up herself a cherry alcohol surprise. She accidentally fixed it in his coke but brought it out to him anyway. The man hated alcohol and with one sip he was drunk. He loved his coke and the waitress told him about the cherry. He rushed straight to the coke factory and messed with the labels and formula and still being drunk, forgot the alcohol. Cherry coke was born.

Diet Cherry Coke. The man who started cherry coke was starting to get a little fat. So he made diet cherry coke for all the little piggies out there like him.

To be continued...

Coke Wars Episode 1, The Phantom Cokace

2005-07-07T23:27:00.000-04:00

COKE

Coke is my favorite soda out there. Original blend without cocaine. But by my opinion, there are too many flavors out there. What's wrong with the original? I will just have to tell you some storys behind each new flavor.

Pure and simple classic Coca-cola. Started out as elixir with cocaine in it to soothe pain. Today we drink it without the cocaine as a tasty soda.

Diet Coke. What a horrible thing. They took all the sugar out of it and still call it Coke. Made specially for the horizontally challenged(fat) people, they were forced by the thin people who drank real coke to change the color of the can to grey.

Caffeine free Coca-cola. :( Why even drink it? There is no caffeine. If you look closely you will even notice they had the nerve to put "CLASSIC" on there. That is horrible. This coke was made for the ICA (Insomniac Clan of America). Real Coca-Cola drinkers protested until the color was changed to gold instead of red because it was disgraceful.

Apparently there is only so much i can put on a post, to be continued.

It Worked!!!

2005-07-07T01:22:00.000-04:00

Just because the last one worked, here is another. This is an old pic of me in my old house.

First attempt of a picture

2005-07-07T01:17:00.000-04:00

Okay readers, its time to try a picture. I haven't tryed one yet cuz I'm lazy but here it goes. If it works it's Ernie smokin pot.

Republicans

2005-07-06T05:47:00.000-04:00

Problems

They don't want anything to live except prenatal babies.
They support no plantlife except the president.
They are hypocritical about gays.

Memorable Republicans

Sandy Cheeks
Darth Vader
Anakin Skywalker

First post!!!

2005-07-06T05:13:00.000-04:00

Anyone reading this, this is my new blog. My name is Ernie and that is how I got the blog title. How are you all doing? This blog will be about everything and nothing more. Hope you enjoy.